When Toxic is Family


When someone related behave inappropriately, or when someone related does or says something one normally would kill someone over, one hears the sentence, “Family is family”. Three simple words. Only two unique words, actually. Yet it holds one back so much and expects so much from one that it’s almost… criminal.

My general rule is if someone begins to become toxic to me, I tell that person what’s wrong and give him a chance to change. But after that, if there is no change, I leave. No more additional chances. Regardless of how I feel.

With family though, it’s different.

One is inexplicably tied to family. By blood, by name, by history. So even though family becomes toxic, one cannot simply cut ties without alienating a part of one’s self. So what to do?

When it’s family that is toxic, one can’t simply let go. But one can try to make peace, and just forgive.


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